Werner Syndrome

Sometimes I ask myself, why do I grow up way too fast - way too soon? Why do I desire to break the mold and defy the stereotypes. What is wrong with me? Not wanting to be like everybody else. Always wanting a little bit more on everything. Always bending things to the point of breaking. Up to this point I still don't know if this attitude of mine would help me or break me down in the long run. I hope by making a blog, I got something to look back to when I encounter another bump in the road or a huge ass pot hole.
Having an Asian background, we are not supposed to get big. But one day I decided that I would not settle to be 5 foot nothing and under 150 lbs. If I wanted to be globally competitive I got to alter my physique, so I worked hard to reach 200lbs, and it turned to be an obsession to the point that it affected the people around me.
Being Filipino who was born and raised in the Philippines, I'm supposed to stay with my parents, have a family of my own while still living in my parents house so when the time comes that my parents become frail I would be there to take care of them as they did for me. But I decided to move out of the house and fend for myself not asking for any support. Don't get me wrong here when the time comes that my parents need me, I'm gonna be there. The reason won't be owing debt of gratitude, but for love and respect.
There are times that I wish that I did not set my goals too high too soon. There are times that I wish that I was still back home with my mom, not thinking of paying my rent, buying groceries, doing the laundry, paying the bills. How I wish that I was the typical Filipino Yuppie who works in a small cubicle answering calls in front of a monitor talking to a stranger. Everything is just clock work. My salary would be more than enough for me because I would still live with my parents and I got no bills to pay. I could buy the latest gadgets, go party with my fellow yuppies on a weekday, groom the car that my mom gave to me as a graduation gift, go on vacation for the weekend, blah blah blah... you get the picture.
But I rather go for the road less traveled, the road to independence. Where the the moment you get your paycheck, you got to allot every single penny because you are on tight budget. That making too much phones calls or a text messages can ruin you budget and set you back for a week or so. That at the end of the day, after a hard day at work you eat spam and eggs for dinner. Not because you love spam, but at this moment, you're so broke it's the only thing that you could afford for now. That on the days that you are not working, you spend your free time, cleaning or doing the laundry.
My mother has something magnetized on her fridge door written on the back of a recycled paper. It says "if you do whats hard today, life would be easy tomorrow". I know that I don't give my mother enough credit on her outlook in life. Every time she would try to tell me something when I was young I would just reply with my eyes rolling as if to say, "yeah yeah yeah... what else". But little did she know, that I was listening. She didn't knew back then that teenager that she would screamed at every day for being a lazy bastard was not really lazy at all. He was just savoring his teen years because he knew that from here on it would be a bumpy ride before he could lay on that couch again and watch TV all day.